The Obscure Joke That Is The Golden Globes: TV Edition

By Scott Raychel

Oh Ricky, you so devious...

Well, the Golden Globes happened last night, and while it may not be said for the movies portion of the awards show, the television awards were sadly predictable, especially given the predictable nominations, which were only overshadowed by the fact that most of the nominations were a complete joke to begin with. But it happened, and with it comes the yearly debate on the merit of the Golden Globes. It’s secondary to the Oscars and the Emmys, but it’s still treated like it’s one of the big guys, despite its quality being consistently low and the outcomes normally ridiculed. This year was no different. Here’s how.

Ricky Gervais Hosted…Again…

Excuse me while I have a word with Ricky Gervais for a moment. Look, we get it, Ricky. You’re CONTROVERSIAL. You say things that supposedly hurt people’s feelings. But the problem with that whole concept is that in the end, you’re only helping those people’s careers. You made fun of the likes of Kim Kardashian, Justin Bieber, and Eddie Murphy, and the internet stands around the proverbial, digital water cooler the next day and plasters their names all over the place. They get a ratings boost without actually have shown up to the ceremony. It worked well the first year, because people didn’t quite expect it. But this year, celebrities basically showed up with a giant target on their backs, waiting for you to say something about them, because they knew their names would be the talk of the next, sad miserable Monday morning. Congratulations, you’re hurting your cause. But the worst part of all this, is that you very likely know this is exactly what you’re doing. You’re a troll and you know it, and the fact I’m taking your bait just means I dislike you even more. Please get off my television screen, you cheeky bastard.

Modern Family Won Best Comedy…Again…

Modern Family, while being a fairly good television show, is a fairly by-the-numbers single camera comedy. It’s been chugging along for a couple years now, not really content with the idea of pushing its boundaries, and when pitted against shows like Enlightened, Episodes, New Girl, and Glee, it wasn’t a surprise it was going to win. But had it been pinned against shows like Community, Parks and Recreation, or Louie, Modern Family wouldn’t (or shouldn’t) stand a chance. Community is the televised definition of the word “ambition,” Parks and Recreation is currently the gold standard for stellar ensemble casts, and Louie is some of the most groundbreaking stuff on television, but all three of these shows were completely snubbed, save for a couple acting nominations that also went un-noted. But if it doesn’t do well in the ratings, then it obviouslyain’t worth caring about. 

Breaking Bad Got Screwed Over…Again...

While it’s a pretty great time for dramas this season, the undisputed king has to be AMC’s already-classic meth juggernaut Breaking Bad. Well, unless you ask the Hollywood Foreign Press, apparently.For the third year in a row, Breaking Bad was nowhere to be seen on the ballots. Sure, Bryan Cranston got a Best Dramatic Actor nod, but lost to KELSEY GRAMMER. Allow me to repeat for emphasis: Three-time dramatic Emmy-winning actor Bryan Cranston lost a dramatic acting award to KELSEY GRAMMER. Season 4 of Breaking Bad not only had some of the best well-acted moments of television this season, but it was good enough that one could argue Bryan Cranston or Aaron Paul could carry a whole movie by themselves. Anyone who would think otherwise should be directed to this video: a brief scene displaying Cranston’s portrayal of a man hanging on to the end of his rope after it’s already snapped and let him fall to absolute rock bottom. The laugh is enough to make Heath Ledger’s Joker himself cringe in tense discomfort. 

Almost Nobody Is Asking Who The Hell The Hollywood Foreign Press Association Is...Again…

Has anyone ever thought about who they are? Everyone knows the Academy is comprised of actors, directors, filmmakers, and more. But the HFPA? Someone did some investigating, and guess what they found out? The people that decide who and what gets nominated and wins Golden Globe awards are actually just real-estate agents, car salesmen, showbiz publicists, hairdressers, and four or five measly journalists. The only requirements for membership are permanent residence in Southern California and only four published articles per year.

And this is exactly why nobody should ever take the Golden Globes seriously. It’s basically a giant circle jerk for people who felt jilted by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. The only reason they’re on television is because Dick Clark managed to get them a shot on network television. But really, nobody should taking award shows seriously, anyways. They’re all circle jerks, and we hate them because they never agree with the word of the people. But then again, how could the Academy or the Hollywood Foreign Press Association be blamed when the general public can’t really be trusted with something like the People’s Choice Awards?

Hardcore Music And The State Of The Local Scene: A Reflection

In the last seven days, I’ve seen a few compelling arguments for the revival of hardcore music in Indianapolis. In referring to music, the term “hardcore” is one of those pesky labels that gets thrown around too loosely and can end up losing its core meaning (pun intended.) But this carelessness of labeling music genres is also a great benefit to hardcore music. It allows for flexibility, which the bands of Indianapolis have taken advantage of.

Adam Jones, of Male Bondage

Chaotic Neutral, having already received a mention on this prestigious blog, are at the forefront of the hardcore revival in the Circle City, but several other bands have stepped up to the task of filling the void left by hometown favorites who have all played their final shows in the last two years. A couple days ago, the Melody Inn bar played host to Male Bondage, a new band with members of Full Rainbow, You’re A Liar, and recently deceased Bolth. This foursome is the result of when the Full Rainbow brothers’ penchant for stoner metal meets the more aggressive and melodic tastes of the other two members’ original bands. 

Sir James Lyter himself.
(Picture taken by Kris Arnold)

Male Bondage’s drummer, James Lyter, also happens to be the drummer for another, currently, more established band, Step Dads. If it wasn’t for Chaotic Neutral existing, Step Dads would’ve gotten my pick for best local hardcore band in Indy, but it’s not to say they’re any less inferior.  It’s female-fronted post-hardcore at its finest, and with a dedication to DIY shows, they’re a valuable asset to Indy’s music scene.

Those who have been involved long enough in the local music community may notice a common thread running through Chaotic Neutral, Step Dads, and Male Bondage. They all share at least one member (Lyter himself is the sole common denominator here). This isn’t at all uncommon in Indy’s band community. Chaotic Neutral’s members have all previously been in bands that have called it quits. Socially conscious punk group Indianapolis Forever has members, save for Piradical Productions co-founder Stephen Zumbrun, are all currently in other bands. Another new hardcore band I’ve seen in the last week, Piss Artist, has members who have been, or are still, in other bands. 

To call any of these bands “super groups” would be a bit unnecessary. A super group happens when a several different artists want to get together to make music because they all figured “Hey, why not?” out a sense of expanding upon their already well-established musical careers. Musical artists on a local level form new bands with each other because they have a constant need to evolve and adapt to the current climate of their local music scene and in their personal lives.

Step Dads

Music scenes, not just in Indianapolis, but anywhere, have this same nature. Eventually, someone somewhere in the scene will cry wolf and proclaim that the music scene is currently dead, and that we need to band together and bring it back to its apparent former glory. Sometimes, they’re right, but way more often than not, they’re hilariously wrong. Music scenes adapt and evolve, just as musicians do. Hardcore bands, I think, are probably the most representative symbol of this nature. Bands don’t last forever. Some don’t last very long at all. But true musicians always find ways to continue their craft and improve themselves and their community, and as long as musicians continue to do this, their music scene will stay strong.

The Current State of Television

Writer’s note: You may know me as the writer for Basements and Bass, Indianapolis’s top source for local music news (suck it, IndyConcerts). But what you may not know about me, is just like any average joe, I loves me some television. So when the Indianapolis music scene leaves me with a little downtime (the gauntlet has been thrown, Indy bands. Get to work!), I will be using this space to write about the state of modern television, where I’ll inform you on what you should be watching (basically the NBC Thursday night line-up and Breaking Bad) and on where you’re screwing up (basically the majority of CBS). 

Television seasons always take a break during the holidays, just when a lot of viewers’ favorite shows just start getting good, leaving the average viewer ready and eager for more come the first week of January. Since there hasn’t been much to dwell on in the last few weeks, it’s time to look forward to when our beloved shows are returning, and which shows should be getting the most of your attention. 

30 Rock (NBC)

There’s a lot of questions to answer returning to this comedy that’s been on hiatus since last spring due to star Tina Fey’s pregnancy. Particularly: How will the show address the death of North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Il after moving him into place as a possible central plot-device near the end of the show’s surprisingly good season five? How will the show, if at all, handle Tracey Morgan’s homophobic tirade from last summer? Will Alec Baldwin phone it in after expressing his desire to leave the show or will he continue to bring his A-game to one of the best characters on 30 Rock? Season six will certainly have a lot on its plate.

Archer (FX)

FX has proved in the last couple years that it can hang with the best the network giants have to offer, and while we’ll still have to wait a while for Louie to return this year, the best animated sitcom on television, Archer, is about to start its third season after a three-part episode featuring the titular spy becoming a pirate king. H. Jon Benjamin has a golden voice for comedy, and having several Arrested Development alumni on board helps this animated comedy remain consistently hilarious, whether or not you may get the jokes.

Community (NBC)

This one’s a little uncertain as to when it’s coming back because DEAR GOD WHY AREN’T YOU WATCHING THIS SHOW YET WE NEED MORE PEOPLE WITH NIELSEN BOXES TO STEP UP BECAUSE IF YOU’RE WATCHING TWO AND A HALF MEN AND THE BIG BANG THEORY INSTEAD OF COMMUNITY YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM AND I HATE YOU! CHILIDISH GAMBINO ANNIE'S BOOBS INSPECTOR SPACE TIME!

How I Met Your Mother (CBS)

It’s still going after seven seasons and only just now appears to be piecing the final parts of the puzzle together, but How I Met Your Mother still somehow manages to remain funny and interesting. I like to call this show the “Lost” of sitcoms because it’s one of the few sitcoms to maintain a rich mythology throughout its run (Arrested Development is a perfect example of how to pull this off). It also helps to have Neil Patrick Harris be the driving force for the central plot of one of the best seasons the show has seen to date. 

Justified and Game Of Thrones (FX and HBO)

RELEVANT

I’m not going to lie to you. I haven’t watched either of these shows, though watching the first season of Game of Thrones is currently on my to-do list. However, both of these shows have received intensely favorable critical adoration and a lot of people have been talking about how great there are, so there. I’m going to go back to watching re-runs of Breaking Bad and Boardwalk Empire.

Misfits (Hulu)

To put it straight, Misfits is the show Heoes wanted to be. This British series about a group of juvenile delinquents gaining super powers acts as a comedy, drama, and sci-fi show all in one. The show’s main anti-heroes deal less with a new villainous threat to the world and more with finding a place to belong in a society that views them as outcasts, despite many members of that society also gaining super powers themselves. While not on American television, Misfits has made its way to Hulu, where the first two seasons are available and the third season is currently under way.

Parks and Recreation (NBC)

It’s hard to care about The Office when Amy Poehler and the rest of the cast of Parks and Rec are living the dream Steve Carrell accomplished and moved on from last year. Parks and Recreation has rapidly become one of the funniest, sweetest, and best shows on television in just three and a half seasons, with fantastic characters that don’t ever feel forced and great comedic writing. This season has been focusing on Poehler’s character, Leslie Knope’s attempts to run for city council and her budding romance with her former co-worker, a romance that’s actually sweet and interesting to watch unfold, which is something most television shows fail to pull off.

Portlandia (IFC)

Consider this my pick for sleeper hit of the season. The first season of this sketch comedy show (which is now on Netflix) headed by Saturday Night Live’s Fred Armisen and indie band Wild Flag’s Carrie Brownstein, features the two as various characters living in Portland, Oregon. Many of the characters are self-important intellectual types like feminist book store owners and self-righteous alternative punks, but Armisen and Brownstein treat the show as more of a love-letter than stinging satire. The first episode opens with a musical number proclaiming “The dream of the 90’s is alive in Portland.”Portlandia aims to celebrate that dream.